You're in love, but you're not ready for marriage.

Many couples live together before exchanging vows. According to the U.S. census, about 4.6 million opposite-sex couples are living with their significant others.

Last week, I wrote about carefully merging money when merging your hearts in marriage. Cohabitation is a totally different scenario.

Antonio and Laura Porretta lived together before getting married to make sure they were "compatible as a couple and with money."

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“There is no advantage to joining finances beforehand,” says Thomas Minigiello, a financial adviser and partner at Crossbridge Financial Group LLC, of Rochester. But he says that there is the downside — if you need to break up finances while breaking up.

Be careful about making joint purchases of big ticket items such as plasma TVs, a matching sofa and loveseat, or worse yet, signing up for a joint credit card. If the romance ends, you'll already have to decide who originally owned the pots and pans, the DVDs — even the dog.

First thing's first

Newlyweds Antonio and Laura Porretta, both 29, of Irondequoit, decided to live together before getting engaged. Antonio says it was a “discovery period to be sure we were compatible as a couple and with money.”

Perhaps they're more savvy with finances than most: this couple's careers revolve around money. Laura Porretta is an assistant branch manager at J.P. Morgan Chase Bank in Fairport while Antonio Porretta is a financial adviser at Brighton Securities.

While roommates, they decided to keep their finances separate. Early on, they sat down each month and talked about the money going out. They decided to split the rent and utilities, while Antonio Porretta forked over a little more for groceries.

This couple had a rule of paying when the bills came due.

“There was no luxury to pay when you're able,” according to Antonio Porretta. But soon after moving in together, their bill-paying system became second nature.

Breaking down the bills

Even before moving in together, sit down and decide how you'll cover the costs.

You'll likely have unequal salaries, so will you pay equal amounts each month? Or will payments be reflective of paychecks?

These are delicate details that must be ironed out before making copies of the keys. It's even worth jotting down the plan and posting it on the fridge.

Remember that when you're living together you don't have the same financial and legal protection as you do after you've said, “I do.”

Alexis Vecchio, 26, of Ogden lives with her boyfriend, Kyle Ganter, 28.

Vecchio says, “We talked about worst-case scenarios and how to keep it fair without absolving the other of financial responsibility.”

Since rent is their largest monthly expense, the couple split it down the middle.

Individually she handles the phone and electric bills while Ganter covers the cable.

With their financial plan, they haven't had any problems with payments.

Talking cash is revealing

Hashing out your finances beforehand and then keeping your end of the bargain is a great way to show your partner that you're financially responsible. If you're squeamish about having this kind of conversation, you might want to take a look at whether you should really be moving in together.

While you're talking about short-term expenses, chat about the future, too. It's an ideal opportunity to see if you have the same ideas about saving for major expenses such as a home, or longer term — like paying for a child's college education or planning for retirement.

This kind of conversation about the long term will also help you decide if you're in it — together — for the long run.